Breaking Point

[ReddDogg]

Last night I saw first hand what happens when shit gets too bad for too long for the standard american dream chasing type of guy.  This wasn't a guy living in luxury, though he did enjoy chasing toys and having stuff.

The guy living across the street from me owns a small business with his best friend and business partner.  They are locksmiths, specializing in helping people when they lock their keys out of the car, as well as rekeying locks on houses.  His business used to be very successful, with 9 full time employees raking in the money for him.  Over the last year +, his business fell off a cliff, and they have been down to just the 2 parterners for a couple of months now.  He confided that they were drawing down their savings to the point he would need to try and get a regular 9-5 job soon, but there they were acting like everything was hunky doory, doing the normal shopping and worrying about buying the lastest stuff, etc.  If you didn't know any better, things were just fine for him and his family.

I haven't talked to him in a couple of weeks, but last night he decided to go into his garage, pull out a gun, and shoot himself in the head.  While he did shoot in what seemed to be the right spot, it didn't kill him, though he might die today, and he likely will be severely brain damaged if not brain dead if he survives.  His 2 year old daughter and his wife were at the dinner table when he did this, and we have been watching the little girl ever since as he clings to life and his wife waits to find out if he will live or die from his wound.

This is a guy who on one hand cares about the car he drives, the TV, the furniture, etc, but he lives in a moderate house (100-120k house price), is driving a paid off vehicle that doubles as his work vehcile, and who did indeed save money during the good times.  From what he told me, he watched his cash savings go from 40k down to nothing over the last year... I have no clue about other investments or anything like that.  We rarely talked money or anything like that, because I for one don't care how fancy any of my stuff is.

My point is, this drives home just how the smart, good decision makers are having shit fall apart to this point.  I still don't know exactly why he did this, but it makes me realize just how not alright our country is becoming.

And on a side note, this guy fell firmly into the land where statistics for unemployment don't count.  He was an economic casualty that didn't show up in any of the numbers that we call our unemployment.  Considering this downturn is harder on the small business types than on the big bailout receiving firms, it is clear that guys like this are probably in every neighborhood, becoming like a cornered cat who just doesn't know what to do or how to get out of this hopeless situation.

[forager]

Sad story Redd. This story will be endlessly repeated in a society that starves the spirit and lives only in the flesh as we slide down economically. The only true happiness comes from within. We forgot how to harness it.

[Six Gun Jim]

Shit almighty, what a waste. People need so badly to be important in this mess that they will end their own lives rather than live a life free of the worry of being important. I like what Bill Hicks (thanks bdrube! ) says about life. Here it is, and we really do kill all the people who remind us that this is all just a RIDE. -James

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/gyzFM8QJBLM&amp;ap=%2526fmt%3D18&amp;rel=0" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/gyzFM8QJBLM&amp;ap=%2526fmt%3D18&amp;rel=0</a>

[notbobdavis]

That is very sad.  He would rather be dead than be precieved as an economic loser.  Geez.     Why do people give a shit about what an aquantance, or neighbor or stranger thinks of them?  Is perception that important?  Now his child may grow up without here father.  I think if he would've thought it threw, he wouldn't have shot himself.   

[Observer]

Depressed folks are not in their right mind.  They can't comprehend a future. 

[Bill Hicks]

And on a side note, this guy fell firmly into the land where statistics for unemployment don't count.  He was an economic casualty that didn't show up in any of the numbers that we call our unemployment.  Considering this downturn is harder on the small business types than on the big bailout receiving firms, it is clear that guys like this are probably in every neighborhood, becoming like a cornered cat who just doesn't know what to do or how to get out of this hopeless situation.


And yet every month the BLS adds fantom jobs with their "birth-death" model claiming those are the uncounted jobs CREATED by small business in this economy.     A horrible story...you're a good person for taking care of the child.

James -- It is indeed, Just a Ride.   

[mtlouie]

What a tragic story. 

I have been saying to people who have mentioned economic troubles and concern about their FICO scores, or not being able to pay their bills, "Don't worry about it.  It's all been propaganda to get us to buy crap to make someone else rich.  I wouldn't waste one minute's sleep over any of it."

It's amazing to see them visibly relax.  They generally say, "Do you think so?"

"Hell, yes!  Keep food on your table and your heat on and screw the damn credit card companies and bill collectors!"

We could go a long way in helping people like this by just loosening the propaganda nightmare they live in.  And it's all an illusion. 

Fuck the bankers!

[forager]

What Louie said.

[Ik]

ReddDogg,

From one Ohioan (Cleveland area) to another, that shock sends a wave that hits home.  Theirs...yours...and mine. 

As to SixGunJim, bdrube/Bill Hicks:....forever...in peace.  A'yup.  Let's go there.

Peace,

Ik

[Ellie]

That is very sad.  He would rather be dead than be precieved as an economic loser.  Geez.     Why do people give a shit about what an aquantance, or neighbor or stranger thinks of them?  Is perception that important?  Now his child may grow up without here father.  I think if he would've thought it threw, he wouldn't have shot himself.   

Obviously, absent the discovery of a suicide note, we'll never know for sure, but I have my doubts that his motive was related to being seen as an "economic loser."

I think it's at least as likely that what pushed him over the edge was the uncertainty.

Someone (and I apologize but I've forgotten who) said once that humans can deal with any situation AS LONG AS THEY KNOW WHAT THAT SITUATION IS. It's the not knowing that does us in.

We're all caught in this downward spiral and the vast majority of people feel totally helpless. If they have jobs they are worried about losing them because they know how unlikely it will be that they can get another. If they're on unemployment they're worried that benefits won't continue to be extended. If they're out of both a job and unemployment benefits, they're worried that the relative or friend they've moved in with is going to lose THEIR income.

It just gets worse and worse, and I believe it's worst of all for those who are/have been the breadwinners for their families. If it's just you you can deal with things to a certain extent, resign yourself to going with the flow and figuring you'll probably survive one way or another, but when you have other people (or, for that matter, animals) that depend on you, the fear of not being able to deal with what might be coming can be overwhelming.

[mtlouie]

Gotta learn to ride the wave.  It's all uncertainty.  Every single second.  It's when we start to believe, as Bill Hicks said, that the ride is real.....that's when the trouble starts. 

It's not easy, but it's the only way we're ever going to stop the insanity.

[stercrazy]

Gotta learn to ride the wave.  It's all uncertainty.  Every single second.  It's when we start to believe, as Bill Hicks said, that the ride is real.....that's when the trouble starts. 

It's not easy, but it's the only way we're ever going to stop the insanity.

Yep, that's it Louie... ride the wave. This goes against the system's indoctrination. Either/Or. Black/White. Rich/Poor. Forgetting all of the variations in between and denying individual differences that all make life worth living.

[fredd58]

My guess is we're going to be seeing more of this stuff as the economy continues to unravel. Makes me just sick to think of the families left behind, especially the children trying to deal with this. I have to wonder, too, do you suppose maybe he had life insurance? After 2 years, many of them pay out even in the case of suicide. Sounds crazy, but he wouldn't have been the first to do it just to try to provide for his family.

[Dasha]

ReddDogg, that's very kind of you to take care of their little girl. That family is going to need a lot of support.

[TLR1138]

I have some upper-middle-class friends and family who have been comfortably riding the gravy train for the last 30 years (booming stock market, real estate investments) and now for the first time in memory they are really hurting. They are really scared. These are the people who are now flocking to Glenn Beck and looking for easy answers to bring their old way of life back. I don't know if they might do something desperate when they finally realize the old "normal" isn't coming back.