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Author Topic: I feel like such a liar and I'm burning out quickly  (Read 1395 times)
Cantheus
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« Reply #15 on: October 30, 2009, 07:03:17 AM »

I wanted to update this and thank you all again for your kind words and thoughts. I can't tell you how much the wisdom and encouragement I find here means to me, although I wasn't really looking for sympathy; just a place to vent, I honestly appreciate it.

As expected, with the onset of colder weather, my case-load has grown quite a bit. In addition to the 20 or so appointments I have per day, I'm also taking walk-ins, although those are at my discretion.
I'm alloted 20 minutes per client, but unless they're simple (social security income, same fuel dealer, no changes) my appointments can take up to 40 minutes - usually from new clients and trying to direct them to further assistance. I usually work through lunch, and stay later, and I've started going in earlier to accommodate the paperwork I have to complete...supposedly in "slow periods" (yeah, right).

I'm seeing so many new people - it's really unbelievable. Yesterday, out of the 20 I saw, 10 were new.
Of the repeat clients, I'm seeing a huge trend in children moving back in with older parents, or grandparents taking on their grandchildren so the parents can find jobs.
On a more sinister note, I'm also seeing people attempting to hide income and assets, which is frustrating in the extreme.
For 99% of these people, what they're hiding wouldn't make a bit of difference for them to qualify, yet they feel the need to lie about it  - something that really irks me. I take things far too personally, I know, but it's just the way I am. They're not lying to ME, they just feel that the govt. owes them something, and frankly I don't blame them, however, it's MY job security when I don't get straight answers, and a certifier has to dig further and finds something I missed due to fraud.
There was a thread last week about what will happen to the Social Security recipients when TSHTF.... I can answer that in one: Most of them are going to die. Period.  They already live so close to the edge, have zero savings, and unless they've got children who can take them in, they're screwed - and I don't mean, "oh this is a minor inconvenience" I mean, done. Over. Finished.
Tuesday, I had a grown man sit in my office and cry.
He said, "two years ago, I was making 80,000 a year. I worked construction, owned my own business, and had enough work to put in 18 hours a day, with 2 helpers. Last year, things got bad and I used my credit cards to stay afloat, this year I have nothing left. I don't know why I didn't save anything. I've never asked for welfare in my life." (I'm not welfare, but I let it roll)
He has a 5 bedroom house, has 2 other properties for which he is entirely underwater, and now can't sell. Both were rentals that he can't rent, because what he would need to get for them is too high for the area to support.
What could I possibly say to this man?
My first thought was, well, had you not been greedy and dumb enough to think the boom would never end, you might have seen this coming - but even if I had, it wouldn't make a bit of difference. What's done is done, and now he has to live with the consequences - and it obviously was killing him.

Our utility company (electricity) has spent the last 2 weeks having a field day in shutting off customers. I field at least six calls a day from people with disconnects - after Nov 15, they are prohibited from doing any shut offs until April (unless they go before the Public Utilities Commission for a hearing, which they rarely do). The emergency fuel/power fund is already gone.
I spoke to one of the outreach workers yesterday and she said, I have enough money left for one emergency fuel delivery (50 gallons) and I have six URGENT notes on my desk, and God knows how many voice mails...who do I give it to?
Things are going to get ugly very quickly, and sometimes I wonder how safe I am at work. All it would take is one unstable person who gets denied to come into my office armed.
Yes, I have an escape plan, I feel foolish to even say that, but I really think it's a valid concern. My son advised taking my baseball bat with me and keeping it under my desk. If I can find a baseball, I just might do it - they'd probably frown on a hand gun  Huh
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"A closed fist holds nothing." - Gaelic Saying - Southern Maine Zone 5
LuaHasFreedom
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« Reply #16 on: October 30, 2009, 08:40:38 AM »

Cantheus, I live on a govt. check and recognize the truth of what you have said about social security. That is why I bought goats. It's nearly killing me to take care of them right now, financially, since it is costing nearly 1/3 of my income to keep them fed. I am managing it because I do not have to pay rent. They are not in milk right now, but once they come into milk, the amount I can earn from a milk share program will completely replace the govt. income. As far as I can see, this is the only solution that you might be able to suggest to people (not goats - but a personal, very small method of survival not based on govt. funding). They need to find some kind of niche to fill in a small area, that includes something that will be considered necessity instead of luxury. Something they can make or do for others, in exchange for food and shelter. For instance, childcare to a single mother that is not money-based but that provides shelter and food in exchange for watching her children while she does something to bring in the food.

You might also take a look at your client base and see if there is someway to connect them up with each other, to share housing so there is only one utility payment instead of four or six. Frankly, the time has come for people to stop looking at separate bedrooms and living rooms - every room in the house needs to be for keeping people warm in the winter. All a person really needs is a bed, a place to get clean and pee, and a place to prepare food.  If there aren't enough bathrooms, then they could set up a porta-potti in a closet somewhere - seriously. I am trying to take it beyond what is "acceptable" and into what is "real." Death from freezing is real. Six lonely old people dying in their lonely apartments because they are alone is real - and those six people could have continued to live and not been lonely if they had found each other. The same goes for families. Think about someone with a five bedroom house - it probably has a family room as well. So, how about three families in the house. The girls have bunk beds in the living room. The boys have bunk beds in the family room. The parents each have a bedroom that doubles as a separate gather room for their individual family. The extra bedroom is for the clothing and extras of everyone.  It can be done, but the only way to bring this into being is to change the paradigm of what is acceptable. You are in a position to help people discover the new acceptable.
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Hope@ZeroKelvin
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« Reply #17 on: October 30, 2009, 09:54:43 PM »

You can only know who good a liar you are when you start playing poker with your own money.

If you lose vast sums, you are not a good liar and thus your advancement in the legal profession is fraught with peril.

If you can win, a lot, you are likely to rise to the top of your profession.

Sorry, but that has been my experience after leaving the poker table wearing only my bra and underwear.

And that was way before drinking the Wild Turkey.
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Cry havoc and let slip the Dawgs of Doom.
You can run but you cannot hide from your Doom.

You can't buy Happiness but you can buy a whole lot of Misery, oops, I mean, DOOM!
LuaHasFreedom
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« Reply #18 on: October 30, 2009, 11:10:37 PM »

um....Hope have you read the thread?
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Hope@ZeroKelvin
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« Reply #19 on: October 30, 2009, 11:18:30 PM »

Yes, and it is a totally depressing account of a basically honest guy with a lot of integrity caught in an impossible situation.

An account of a basically decent and beautiful human being forced into telling falsehoods to keep his clients and his own sanity intact.

An account a of guy being forced to prop up an totally EVIL and unsustainable and hateful system  lest said system collapse and wash him and his famiy away.

An account of a guy trying to put all his fingers and toes in the dike of a raging river and the water just keeps rising and rising and the cracks are spreading and no one is there to help or give a frakking damn and he is the last man standing.

Just trying to inject some levity.

Sorry if it fell flat.
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Cry havoc and let slip the Dawgs of Doom.
You can run but you cannot hide from your Doom.

You can't buy Happiness but you can buy a whole lot of Misery, oops, I mean, DOOM!
Cantheus
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« Reply #20 on: October 31, 2009, 08:35:45 AM »

An account of a guy .....


Who happens to look damn good in HER bra and panties  Grin

<checking>

yep, I got all the right parts - no dangly bits, well...moderately dangly north of the equator...but I've never gotten any complaints about those!

The poker analogy did make me smile - Thanks Hope.

@ Lua - What a fantastic idea!!! Yours is probably the most well thought out plan I've heard. I agree combined housing/boarding house/room & board are going to be the only way to go in the very near future. If we could only get people to stop thinking in terms of having "their own personal space" (which usually amounts to something like their own personal bedroom suite with sleeping quarters, a bath, and a lounge area in addition to a walk in closet that would hold a bed and a bureau)! Of course, zoning laws make those sorts of arrangements difficult/impossible ATM.

Privacy and personal space are going to be luxuries few are going to be able to afford. The difficulty comes in making people see that. There is a very  perverse sense of entitlement among Americans that sort of makes me nauseas - but I think the time is coming when we're all going to see things from a much different perspective. At least, I hope so... because if we can't get past that entitlement, and find a place where we help each other, we're done.
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"A closed fist holds nothing." - Gaelic Saying - Southern Maine Zone 5
LuaHasFreedom
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« Reply #21 on: October 31, 2009, 11:41:59 AM »

It occurs to me that you are in a position to facilitate an informal association among people. You might consider sending a letter to each of your clients asking them if they would be interested in something similar to a "car-pooling" only call it a "house-pooling" and if they are, would they respond so that you could allow them to share information with each other. Totally informal and unsponsored of course.
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metaforge
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« Reply #22 on: October 31, 2009, 12:34:14 PM »

That's a great idea.  The best way for people in this situation to prepare is to start to learn to work together & share what limited resources they have.  Most may decline, or have circumstances that do not allow them to participate, but at least you've given it a shot.
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Hope@ZeroKelvin
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« Reply #23 on: October 31, 2009, 08:38:03 PM »

An account of a guy .....


Who happens to look damn good in HER bra and panties  Grin

<checking>

yep, I got all the right parts - no dangly bits, well...moderately dangly north of the equator...but I've never gotten any complaints about those!

The poker analogy did make me smile - Thanks Hope.

@ Lua - What a fantastic idea!!! Yours is probably the most well thought out plan I've heard. I agree combined housing/boarding house/room & board are going to be the only way to go in the very near future. If we could only get people to stop thinking in terms of having "their own personal space" (which usually amounts to something like their own personal bedroom suite with sleeping quarters, a bath, and a lounge area in addition to a walk in closet that would hold a bed and a bureau)! Of course, zoning laws make those sorts of arrangements difficult/impossible ATM.

Privacy and personal space are going to be luxuries few are going to be able to afford. The difficulty comes in making people see that. There is a very  perverse sense of entitlement among Americans that sort of makes me nauseas - but I think the time is coming when we're all going to see things from a much different perspective. At least, I hope so... because if we can't get past that entitlement, and find a place where we help each other, we're done.


Sorry, sorry, was speaking in the generic.  You are in an impossible situation trying to do the "right" thing and are likely very loyal and I commend you.  Just remember that no good deed goes unpunished.  Hang in there, you are one of those "duct tape" people who obviously tries to keep things going even when the wind is blowing 100 mph and the storm is coming.

((hugs))

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Cry havoc and let slip the Dawgs of Doom.
You can run but you cannot hide from your Doom.

You can't buy Happiness but you can buy a whole lot of Misery, oops, I mean, DOOM!
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