Earl tries a cleanse!

[earl]

Ever met those crazy people that swear by "cleanses" to detoxify their body?  Well, now I'm one of them.  My system has gotten a bit toxic as of late and I've been feeling the need to flush it clean.  I've been exercising twice daily, working up a sweat, eating well and this is the final "stage" of my plan to get myself back to a healthier balance.  I've even convinced the boyfriend (Drew) to join me in this last stage. 
I talked to a bunch of people at work about what cleanses they've tried, and the one that got the best reviews was the "Master Cleanse."  It's cheap, simple to do and, from what I've heard, gets results.
We shall see...  I have my doubts.  Firstly, I'm prepetually hungry.  I mean constantly.  And I LOVE food.  I don't get to eat any for ten days, starting this morning.  Will I make it?  Secondly, will I still have the energy to exercise?  Getting my workouts everyday is extremely important to me.  I haul my tired little but out of bed every morning at ten to six so that I can life weights before work and run about two miles.  Then, in the afternoons, I do interval training for about 45 minutes.  Thirdly, will I still have enough of a head on my shoulders to do a passable job at work?  I promise I'll keep y'all posted.
The Master Cleanse involves drinking a "lemonade" for ten days straight and watching how your body purges toxins.  It's simple enough and the only things I had to purchase for this were lemons and grade B maple syrup.  The directons call for mixing two tablespoons maple syrup with two tablespoons lemon juice (I just squeeze half a lemon) and cayenne pepper to taste and then adding about eight ounces of water.  I drank my first lemonade this morning and it's not at all gross.  Just different.  It's a nice combination of sweet, sour and spicy.  Interesting.  Drew made funny faces when he drank his.  I always wake up starving, so I had my doubts as to wether this lemonade would take the edge off my desire for my usual flaxseed/yogurt mix followed by oatmeal and/or eggs.  So far, so good.
The maple syrup provides simple sugars that keep your metabolisim running just fine, along with minerals.  The lemon juice provides vitamins (most notably C, which promotes healing) while balancing your bodies acid to alkaline balance (although the juice is acidic, it turns very alkaline in your tummy, I don't know how) and the cayenne pepper removes mucus buildup. 
Anyway, we have yet to go out and buy the herbal laxative tea that keeps your bowels moving to ensure that the purged toxins get out.  Lovely thought, huh?
I'm sure you all are just dying to hear how this goes, so I'll do my best to post something as often as I can.  If anyone out there has done this before and has advice, I'd love to hear it.
Cheers,
Earl the Girl

[StrangeFire]

Earl, I tried that once, except it was a 5 day fast. Couldn't even brush teeth with toothpaste--only baking soda. And after day 3 you had to take some sort of purgative drink. Longest 5 days of my life. I passed out a lot. Good luck...

[earl]

You passed out a lot?!?  Great...  But, your cleanse sounds way more intense than mine.  Example, I get to brush my teeth with toothpaste and I don't have to take a purgative drink.
I'm hoping I won't have issues with passing out, since I can drink as much of the lemonade as I'd like.  So if I get faint, I can get more simple carbs into me to prevent passing out.
But still, no delicious, wonderful food for ten days.
Earl

[Chesire]

I can wait till TSHTF everybody is going to get a cleanse whether they like it or not 

[StrangeFire]

Yeah, no lemonade for me. Just water.

[OldHorseman]

   Y'all doin' it the hard way.

   If I want to clean out the system, it only takes a quick trip up to the Hardee's on the highway...  A big box of chicken from there tastes great... On the way down.  But the next day EVERYTHING gets expelled in all directions, including a sweat-out better than any steam lodge.

[PHILLIHP]

I tried it once and only got past 30 hours I'm goint to hate PO.

I've sufferd from some strange autoimmune issue for years (once went blind for 4 months in one eye).
Have what many say is Fibro or early MS. So I am always battling pain/weakness.

So, I attempted the alternative approach. When you are desperate, you try anything.

Well, I am about $1000 poorer and in as much pain as ever. But, I did not "complete" the clense.

IMHO, much of the cure from alternative medicine is just like religious "blessings"... if you weren't cured, then you didn't believe enough. It puts the failure on the victim. Also puts impossible rules to follow and is geared to fail.

I believe there are elements that will improve your health, but the industry is so riddled with people praying on ths sick, I gave up on them. I hope this helps you out.

So, not sure the clense won't work but, if you fail, you will feel like me.. that it was your fault. I would bet 9 out of 10 fail to complete it.

[BlueOwl]

Just a side note.  I recently read that many cases of Fibromyalgia may actually be simple vitamin-D deficiency.  New research is suggesting our indoor lifestyle coupled w/ our sunscreen lifestyle is leaving most w/o enough vitamin-D.  USDA RDA's are probably far too low.  The levels are set to ward of rickets, but research is suggesting that far more vitamin-d in our diets (or produced from sun exposure) could alleviate all kinds of problems from skin sensitivity and muscle pains (fibro like symptoms) to immune problems to depression.

[houseoftang]

Good friend of mine tried the same thing, and it worked well for him.  I suspect it'll work well for you.  I have the nagging feeling that I'll be the BF trying this with the GF someday in the relatively near future. . .

[JurisDoctorOfDoom]

I have a tablespoon of organic lemon juice in my water each morning.  I also take Liv-52 with my meals to improve digestion and liver/kidney function.

The "cleanses" seem a bit extreme to me although if it works for somebody then great. I figure it's better to incorporate things into your daily routine that have the desired effect than going balls (or ovaries) out for 2 week. Of course you could go ovaries out for 2 weeks and then from there on out incorporate small things into your daily routine.

[JurisDoctorOfDoom]

I believe there are elements that will improve your health, but the industry is so riddled with people praying on ths sick, I gave up on them.

There is a lot of truth to this and it mirrors my experiences too. I'm fortunate in that my freakish reading comprehension ability has enabled me to sift though an amount of info the past 5-7 years that it would take most folks 20-25 years to sift through. I'm not saying that to brag, it's my one freakish talent. (Everybody has one)

[earl]

So far, I'm hungry.  Extrodinarily hungry...     Not unexpected.  I've got the metabolisim of a racehorse.  It's a blessing.
I've NEVER done anything this extreme before.
I don't trust the "industry" either.  I don't take supplements or vitamins based on a variation of one of Michael Pollan's (love him!!!) rules - don't eat anything your grandmother wouldn't recognize as food.  The only reason I take flaxseed oil is because it's recogniziably an oil (aka food).  I know, I know, this makes me sound something like a crazy person.  I imagine you all thinking something along the lines of "she doesn't take vitamins...  how unhealthy."  I hope not!  I try and eat a very good diet of mostly plants (Pollan again!).  Besides, those things won't be around PPO anyway.
Based on the above, I chose to do this cleanse based on word-of-mouth and because I'm not paying for tonics or pills.  Just good old recogniziable lemons and maple syrup.
But, it's true, I've officially gone "ovaries out."
cheers,
Starvin' Earl

[justanouveaufarmer]

Hey Earl, I did that cleanse once.   I lasted nine days.  Do a search for "dosha vata" and make sure you're not a vata.   Vata consititutions don't do well with fasting.   I wish I had known that before I did it, because I suffered some ill effects that took a while to get over.  It's a great cleanse for other doshas, though. 
Good luck with it.

[JurisDoctorOfDoom]

So far, I'm hungry.  Extrodinarily hungry...     Not unexpected.  I've got the metabolisim of a racehorse.  It's a blessing.
I've NEVER done anything this extreme before.
I don't trust the "industry" either.  I don't take supplements or vitamins based on a variation of one of Michael Pollan's (love him!!!) rules - don't eat anything your grandmother wouldn't recognize as food.  The only reason I take flaxseed oil is because it's recogniziably an oil (aka food).  I know, I know, this makes me sound something like a crazy person.  I imagine you all thinking something along the lines of "she doesn't take vitamins...  how unhealthy."  I hope not!  I try and eat a very good diet of mostly plants (Pollan again!).  Besides, those things won't be around PPO anyway.
Based on the above, I chose to do this cleanse based on word-of-mouth and because I'm not paying for tonics or pills.  Just good old recogniziable lemons and maple syrup.
But, it's true, I've officially gone "ovaries out."
cheers,
Starvin' Earl

I don't think avoiding supplements is necessarily a bad idea. As an overall strategy, Pollan's is probably as good as it gets. I just think there is a role for them in some ways as we are under a variety of severe environmental stresses our grandparents never had to experience: emf pollution, chemicals in the water, off-the-richter scale asshattery throughout society, etc. So we have to compensate for those or help our bodies deal with them. Stress, for instance, screwups up the disgestive track. Most westerners have completely screwed up digestive tracks by 21. (One of the reasons I take the Liv-52)

Supplements won't be around PPO but neither will affordable electricity, gasoline, or federal reserve notes but we still make use of those while they're still available.

[Green2Go]

Hey Earl, I did that cleanse once.   I lasted nine days.  Do a search for "dosha vata" and make sure you're not a vata.   Vata consititutions don't do well with fasting.   I wish I had known that before I did it, because I suffered some ill effects that took a while to get over.  It's a great cleanse for other doshas, though. 
Good luck with it.

Good idea!  Here is a link to a site on Dosha with a quiz you can take to see your tendency.  http://www.whatsyourdosha.com/
I'm a Pitta and it really fits me.  The food list that is recommended is spot on except there are a few items I just can't avoid and am willing to suffer any consequences.